{Dates 24 & 25} The Trainer Part 2 and The Gay Guy???

Wednesday October 22

On a Wednesday morning I somehow figure out how to fit in a sort of complete workday and two dates into one day. I schedule the first date for the afternoon and the second one after dinner time. And so the adventure continues…

{DATE 24} The Trainer turned Artist 

Its date two with the trainer and since I’m getting a little tired of the usual dinner and drinks thing, I ask him to meet me at the art museum. He sends me a text in reply to my request: “I like that idea, I’m an artist too,” he says. Well now I’m intrigued…

It’s a beautiful sunny afternoon, and we meet at the west entrance where the gardens are still blooming and I almost forget it’s fall. We walk inside to buy our tickets. “I’ll get it,” I say to him,” I don’t know why I feel compelled to pay, but he doesn’t object. “Thanks,” he says with a smile.

We walk through the courtyard to go upstairs and check out the main exhibit, which is about money. The art is refreshing, full of nuances about the meaning and use of money in society. There are canvasses displaying historical facts intermingled with beautiful sculptures. There’s a huge display entirely made of dollar bills that tells a story of capitalism, freedom and greed. Needless to say, my date and I are fully entertained.

“So you’re an artist?” I ask him somewhere between the diamond display and the pennies sculpture. “I’ve had a few shows,” he replies. I’m impressed, turns out The Trainer is packing more than biceps up his sleeve! He pulls out his phone and shows me a gallery of canvas paintings that he’s done, the man has skills. My favorite piece is one of a cotton plantation field he says is hanging in his living room.

We finish our tour of the top floor and his phone alarm goes off. “I have to get back to the gym,” he says with an apologetic smile. We walk outside together and I ponder if he’ll want to be my friend, once he finds out about this challenge. He’s a nice guy who I enjoy chatting with, but the chemistry is not there. I consider telling him about my feelings before we reach the parking lot, but I decide it might be presumptuous of me so I give him a hug and say goodbye instead.

(Date 25} The Gay Guy???

This might be the date I’ve been most looking forward to since the challenge began. We had planned a first date, that got canceled because he had to work late. Then our second date got canceled because he had to work late again. I’m beginning to wonder if he has a girlfriend. I know, I know, call me paranoid but it wouldn’t be the first time! Finally we set up a third date. “Third time’s a charm!,” he texts me the morning of.

I’ve had a good vibe about him since we started charting on tinder. He seems like a very down-to-earth interesting guy with some charming qualities, so I naturally look forward to meeting him. Unfortunately, it turns out to be another case of mistaken identity. His tinder pictures tell a story of a handsome, LA guy with a scruffy beard who works out, eats healthy and owns a chihuahua. Hi real-life self is a completely different book. “I haven’t worked out in like a year,” he tells me. You don’t say…

But it’s not just his body that’s different, it’s also his personality. On tinder he was charming and in person he’s kind of awkward and dare I say it, possibly gay??? He talks about his dog, his life and it all has a lot of hand movement and wrist folding, and perhaps I’m pre-judging so I ask a few key questions like: Where did you get that shirt, and what’s your favorite TV show. To which he replies: “My sister gave it to me,” and “I don’t watch TV.” Okay, so maybe he’s just a really big hand talker with some feminine qualities, nothing wrong with that. But then he says: “I like your nail polish.” Ok that’s very specific, and I can’t remember the last straight guy who complimented my nail polish… Still, I can’t seem to figure him out. I mean I know that if he were gay, he wouldn’t be on a date with me, but maybe this isn’t a date to him and he’s just trying to make a new friend. I don’t know!!!

I take another drink of wine and think back to how comedian Louis CK describes a typical first date: “A guy in a first date, just has no actual personality, he’s just a miss mash of different kinds of dudes for a couple seconds each…just like a ransom note cut out of a lot of magazines.” If you’ve never seen this, please check out the clip below!

Anyway, what Louis CK says is right on point with my date tonight. He’s not the same guy I chatted with a few days earlier, so what gives? Is he just nervous? Socially awkward? Or is this who he really is? But more importantly, I wonder if it would be right of me to judge him based on a single impression… Maybe it’s not fair to him, but trusting my gut is also an important part of dating, and right now my gut is saying: “You’re not attracted to this guy, he’s not who you thought he would be, move on and don’t waste your time or his!”  

~ #NotTheCoolGirl


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